Anonymous 3m 643 #niceguy
The views of this article are the perspective of the author and may not be reflective of Confessions of the Professions.
Nice Guys Finish Last
The worst thing that any “nice guy” wants to hear, “Nice Guys Finish Last”. Another thing that a nice guy is tired of hearing is, “You’re too nice.” As he grins and thinks to himself, “If you only knew me, you’d realize that I can be nice, but I’m not always nice.” I’m a nice guy myself and I’m also an asshole. Yup, I have gotten angry and told people to fuck off, I have gotten pissed and yelled at people, I have stood up for myself and been in a fist fight, and I have also done some things I’m not so proud of in my life. I haven’t done anything that has landed me in jail, but if I had been caught at the time of doing it, I probably could’ve found myself in trouble with the law. If that constitutes being nice, than I can’t imagine what those people have done in their lives who have told me that I’m a nice guy. To those people who still think of me as a nice guy after the shit I have done, thanks for still believing in me!
I can be the nicest guy in the world and I can be the meanest most rudest asshole on the planet. It all depends on how you treat me and if you catch me on a good day. In general, I am pretty nice and I try to treat others with respect – pretty much, I treat people as I would expect to get treated, especially my waiter or waitress.
Fortunately, I have no regrets of ever being the nice guy or “appearing” as the nice guy. It would take more than just my fingers and toes to count the number of women who have told me I was too nice or categorized me directly into the friend zone. As a nice guy, I have learned many things, and it has only helped me, because in the end, I have especially learned that in a way, “Nice guys finish last” is certainly true, and I couldn’t be anymore happier about it.
The major lesson learned of being the nice guy: We are the patient wolves. We watch patiently as the other wolves get their first choice, but their first choice only seems too good, until it is too late. We are the wolves who watch and wait, learning what is and what is not a good pick. It may seem that because of this, we miss out on the best choices, but what appears to be the best choice, may not in fact, be a great choice at all. These are the lessons I have learned in being the nice guy and I still remain the nice guy today.
But when she tells you that you are too nice, what she is really telling you: “Tell me your feelings, tell me what is on your mind, and let me know what you want.” You need to make the move, ask her out, and don’t be afraid of expressing your feelings. If you fear doing this, you will have to let her go, let her move on, and you will have to move on yourself, and you will regret it. So please, do yourself a huge favor, and take the risk. The risk is worth everything and could lead to your greatest reward, but just know, even if you get this reward, which is her, you will need to continue working hard to earn her respect, her trust, and her love. So do what you need to do and eliminate all doubt. Ask her out. Ask her to be your girlfriend. Ask her to be yours. And if she says no, respect that, and move on, but take a chance. It’s better than living with the regret of not asking.