The Art of Saying No

Matthew Gates http://notetoservices.com 5m 1,159 #sayingno

The views of this article are the perspective of the author and may not be reflective of Confessions of the Professions.

The Saying No Framework

In any company, it may seem that the customer is always right, but unfortunately, it cannot always be this way. In many cases, “yes” can easily be done and for many companies, they are willing to take the extra time to go above and beyond to satisfy their customer’s needs, but there are some times where it just cannot be done. Saying no is one of the absolute worst things you want to do and can do to a customer, but sometimes, there is no other solution, other than to say “no” because saying “yes” is just not a possibility.

For most employees, they rarely want to use those words, but they find themselves having to do it. In fact, it may seem that some companies will not even tell you no, as they have automated the process of saying “no” for their employees. If you have ever tried to apply for a credit card or a bank loan online, your social security and credit score is checked instantly and within seconds, you are given your answer, and if it was “no”, no employee or the company even had to hear about it.

Saying no is one of the hardest things most employees have to do, but saying it the right way may help. There is a framework for saying no that allows employees to say no without actually saying no. This framework entails four key ideals:

1. Empathy statement
2. Pause
3. And
4. Here’s what I can do

These ideals should be the standard for saying no. When dealing with an actual customer, the “No Framework” sounds like this after hearing the issue:

“I agree with you, your issue is now my concern – and – I’d like to tell you what I can do for you.”

This statement avoids complete negativity and is a positive statement. Not only does this continue to keep the attention of the client, but it may keep the client calm because they now have an understanding that their issue is being wholeheartedly heard and taken care of. Keeping a client calm is one of the most important parts of saying “no”. Most clients do not like the word “no” or anything negative that you could possibly say to them, so the idea is to keep the phrases positive, while working with the client to resolve the issue.

As part of the standard for saying “no”, it should never be the end of the issue. “No” should never solve an issue. “No” should always offer an alternative solution. The initial concern or issue should always be addressed regardless of how great the words “no” sound. Words, phrases, or tones that are negative should never be introduced into the interaction. When the solution is not yet a positive one and the answer is leading to “no”, the tone of the employee should remain positive. The tone of the employee will aid in the customer tone.

Negative words that should never be used in a conversation when saying no:

1. No
2. Nope
3. But
4. Cannot
5. Sorry

There is a long list of terms for saying “no” and every phrase that could possibly mean “no” should always be avoided.

“Sorry” is one of the worst words you can use. The feeling it gives the client is that the employee does not care. When has “sorry” ever solved anything? The client does not care about hearing the words, “sorry”. The client cares about seeing action to having their issue resolved. After that happens, “sorry” can be used and the client will be much more understanding and accepting of those words. Until any action is taken and completed, those words should be avoided and are likely to upset and frustrated the client even more, driving them to negative feelings towards the employee handling the issue and the company itself.

Personally, when I hear “sorry”, I just want to hang up. If I don’t end up hanging up, I usually end up asking, “Are you really sorry? Did it ruin your day like it has been ruined? If not, than you aren’t really sorry. Please try to help me resolve this issue.” Of course, I want to say more, and sometimes worse, but the term “sorry” just doesn’t really do much for anyone, the employee, or the customer. No one wants to call a company or their customer service to deal with an issue, but when they do, the last thing they want to hear are those ‘sorry ass words‘.

Phrases such as “I’m/we’re sorry, there is nothing I/we can do” immediately lets the client know how much control or power the employee has at the company, meaning the client already has it in their mind that the employee is just a “worker bee” who does not have the ability to think for themselves, and this gives off a negative vibe of the overall company. This generally happens with much larger companies, specifically credit card companies. When an employee offers an alternative solution and remains with the client until the issue is resolved or offers to transfer the client to another employee that is in the position of power to resolve the issue, there is a more positive vibe towards the overall company.

In my own experience, I dealt with several credit card companies in order to resolve a lower APR for credit cards I had. The credit card companies that flat out basically said, “no” or used any negative words, phrases, or tones no longer have my business, and their credit cards have been shredded, while the ones that said “yes” or offered an alternative solution still receive plenty of business (money) from me in interest. While credit card companies are large enough not to care about losing business from their customers, smaller businesses are more likely to feel the loss of a client or customer no longer giving them any business. After all, the majority of companies have plenty of competition, so a “no” could lead to a transfer of a customer from one company to another.

“No” should never be the permanent solution or the answer. If the request is impossible to fulfill, than a no may be necessary, but at all costs, a solution should be found or a policy should be in place that allows some leeway in light of saying “no”. A company that wants to keep up a good reputation should work with their clients or customers rather than flat out tell them “no” to something. The issue with saying “no” is that for every “no” that you have, there is another company out there working on a “yes” to replace all “no” words. Eventually, when you have said no too often to too many customers, there are plenty of other companies who were happy to say yes to your former clients or customers. Consider practicing and a policy of not saying no and see how far your business will go.

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