The views of this article are the perspective of the author and may not be reflective of Confessions of the Professions.
The First Kiss Is The Most Important Kiss
You have met the one, the one you have been waiting for your entire life. You feel as if you have known them all your life and you connect with them on so many levels. They understand you, you know them and they know you. Nothing else in the world matters except this person is your one true love. Although there are many things that go into someone being another’s true love, one of the most important features of mending this bond and making it true love is the power of the first kiss.
The first kiss is everything and will usually determine everything about the person that you want to know. The first kiss may or may not deliver sparks, but this does not mean the person is or is not your true love. However, the first kiss, specifically the first passionate kiss, is the moment where both potential partners learn about their intimacy towards each other. A first kiss feels right, especially with the person you are kissing. The first kiss may determine the rest of your relationship.
While I am certainly not going to give any kissing lessons in this article, I have been told that I am a great kisser – maybe she was lying, but she did become my fiancée, so I must have done something right. Some people are naturally good at kissing, while other people are sloppy kissers, and some need a little help and advice, but if you have fears of your newfound loved one not liking you because of the way you kiss, than let them know you do not kiss people often, or ever, for the matter, and that this is your first time. It will make them feel all the more special and forgive all your mistakes in kissing. If they find it a turn off, than this person may not be that special newfound love you were looking for in a significant other.
A little advice about kissing: Take your time, come about halfway with each other, and put those lips to work. You may even want to gently grab your newfound love’s face and move in for the kiss, making it even easier for you both to find each others’ lips. Make sure your lips have enough moisture, but not enough that you might slobber on your newfound love; make sure your breath smells good, and that the person you are kissing is ready for the kiss. For your first kiss, depending on your chemistry with the one you are kissing, you may or may not want to consider a french kiss. You must feel them out if they are willing to go that far with you for your first kiss. Closed eyes are optional, but they do intensify the experience of feeling the kiss, of being able to feel those lovely wonderful lips of your newfound loved one.
Additional advice: Treat every kiss as if it were your first and never forget your first kiss with each other.
While this scene did win Best Kiss on MTV in 1994, you should probably not kiss this way:
This infographic discovers the importance of the first kiss. Infographic courtesy of Neomam Studios.
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The Importance of the First Kiss
59% men & 69% women Report losing interest in someone they were attracted to after their first kiss.
What’s in a Kiss?
Kissing between romantic partners occurs in over 90% of human cultures.
There are 3 main theories as to why humans kiss:
- Kissing assesses potential mates based on their smell and taste
- Kissing induces bonding through the exchange of pheromones and sebum
- Kissing increases arousal and receptivity to intercourse
SMELL & TASTE
Bad breath and an unpleasant taste in the mouth can be an indication of underlying health problems.
Males and females place equal importance on fresh breath.
Bad Breath = Poor Health = Less Desirable Mate
The exchange of saliva can transfer important pheromones and sebum which help to develop psycho-chemical bonds between partners.
Males prefer their kisses moist.
MOUTH & TONGUE CONTACT
Open-mouthed kissing and increased tongue contact are regarded as intimate gestures.
Half of males prefer the first kiss to be open-mouthed.
A third of females like their first kiss to be open-mouthed.
The same goes for the amount of tongue contact involved in a kiss.
When asked if they would continue a relationship with a bad kisser
Females are far less tolerant of a poor kiss.
the PERFECT kiss
Nice smelling and tasting breath
Too dry – Too tame
A little tongue contact – Too smelly – Slightly moise lips
Top tips for the perfect kiss:
- Suck on a mint beforehand
- Put on some lip balm
- Be careful with that tongue
- Privacy – People want the first kiss to be special, personal and private. Not shared with a room-full of people.
- Be tactile – Touch is an important signal to see how things are progressing. Break the touch barrier with your partner. If they touch you back, it’s a good sign.
- Know when to stop – Ten seconds is a good amount of time for a first kiss; longer and you may come on too strong, shorter and you may seem scared.
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