The views of this article are the perspective of the author and may not be reflective of Confessions of the Professions.
Good Sex Makes You Tired
There is a saying: Sex is like pizza. Even when it’s bad, it’s still pretty good. Hardly believable because a woman who does not orgasm and has to watch her man roll over and fall asleep after he is finished, without ever making sure she has been satisfied, would have probably preferred to just eat some pizza and found it more satisfying.
Men, on the other hand, despite having an orgasm, may not always be satisfied. Ejaculating too quickly or being unable to ejaculate at all leads to feelings of sorrow, guilt, sadness, and certainly no satisfaction. It could be said that just getting laid or having sexual intercourse is enough to be satisfied, but when one or both partners have not seen each other through their orgasms, than you might say that it was not particularly bad sex, but it was not particularly good sex, either.
Bad sex or unsatisfying sex leads to one partner or both partners feeling resentful towards themselves or each other. The feelings of anguish or frustration may arise towards the sexual relationship, or it may even lead to a lack of sexual interest in each other or sex in general, causing sexual dysfunction issues in both men and women resulting in physical distress or mental exhaustion.
Good sex or satisfying sex usually leads to both partners being satisfied, either in the form of orgasm, or one partner satisfying the other and being comfortable with the satisfaction of their partner. When it comes to good sex, however, both partners usually want to ensure each other are satisfied. In order for women to have good sex and achieve orgasm, they usually require foreplay, often something men overlook way too often or rush through it, not giving her enough time to heat up and get in the zone. A woman needs to know she is your number one, that she is your complete focus, and she needs be touched, teased, played with, possibly receive oral sex, and mentally prepared for sexual intercourse.
If a man takes his time with his woman, he will learn that her orgasm may come easier, resulting in her wanting to please him in every way possible, including having sex more often, or quite possibly, her just being satisfied at the moment and wanting to go directly to sleep. The joke here is that women usually want to cuddle after sex and men do not, but in fact, if you satisfy a woman to reach her orgasm, she will probably leave you alone for the rest of the night. If you satisfy her a few times a week or a few times a month, she will never leave your side and probably worship you most of the time, and you will be happy to know that you do, in fact, have a sex life, and its not just a sex life with yourself most of the time.
For women looking to satisfy their man, ejaculation may mean orgasm for men, but it does not always mean pleasure. Men actually do need some foreplay too, in the form of touching, teasing, being played with (“don’t neglect the balls“), possibly oral sex, and also mentally prepare to actually last longer. A man who ejaculates too fast may get some satisfaction, but may often end up disappointed, because he did not have the satisfaction of really feeling his orgasm and appreciating it with his woman or bringing his woman to reach her orgasm.
In order to deal with this problem, a man can help a woman reach orgasm in other ways, or if both partners wish to achieve an orgasm together with the penis and the vagina, he may want to ejaculate first before sexual intercourse, through masturbation or with help from his partner, and after waiting through his refractory period, foreplay between both partners can begin even further through sensual kissing, teasing, touching, being played with (don’t neglect the clitoris), and quite possibly oral sex. Afterwards, he should be able to last longer, making sure she is satisfied as well.
If you are a woman: Do not be afraid to introduce your battery-operated vibrating best friend to your man, but be sure to let him know that it is not a replacement, it is simply an addition to heightening the sensations of your orgasm. If you assure him that the thought of the combination of his penis and the vibrator inside of you makes you want him even more, he will be much more willing and comfortable with the idea.
If you are a man: Do not be afraid to allow her to introduce and use sex toys in the bedroom, and do not become jealous of her sex toys. After all, they are just toys. You may not be able to bring her to orgasm alone, but between your penis, her vagina, and her sex toy, her orgasm will be much easier, faster, and more satisfying for her and you. In addition to the pleasure of being inside of her and her vibrator, you may want to throw in a cock ring, which will help you last even longer and intensify your own orgasm. The vibrations from her sex toy may also help you feel more satisfaction as well.
Once a woman is satisfied, she will usually moan in ecstasy, say thank you, tell you she loves you, or let you know, “that was amazing”, then she will roll over and fall asleep, wanting nothing more to do with you for the rest of the night. Mission accomplished!
Do not be surprised if she cooks you breakfast, treats you like a king, and is at your side the next day. Appreciate her just as much as she appreciates you, as she shared a very intimate moment with you that you both achieved together.
You are the man and you satisfied her. In a way, you have achieved temporary Saint status. If you are looking for a higher status or to hold your Saint status, good luck. But for now, good job, your work is done. Until next time, keep the bedroom sex life sacred, and continue to flirt and romance each other and look forward to good sex, which will also help you both sleep much better at night, and have more concentration and productivity during the day.
The idea and concept of good sex is to communicate and understand each other’s sexual interests, needs, and demands. Communication during sex takes the guess work out of what pleases each other. A lot of time, which most of us do not have, can be saved and a lot of satisfaction and great sex can be had. While spontaneous sex might be great, planned sex can also be just as wonderful, especially on the weekends. Good sex leads to satisfying orgasms which results in a more satisfying relationship, a mutual understanding, and a deep respect for one another, and of course, a very good night sleep.