The views of this article are the perspective of the author and may not be reflective of Confessions of the Professions.
The Magic of the Mystery Vibe
I was tasked with an important mission!
A mission of such utmost importance it would alter my life forever.
The mission that I chose to accept was to use and review a new product called Crescendo Mystery Vibe. I am not usually one to jump on the bandwagon for these types of products but thought, ‘what the hell do I have to lose?’
I am a creature of habit and sadly one of the most non-orgasmic women in the world. It is really difficult for me to achieve the ‘Big O’. If I do it is because I am using my ‘Big Blue‘ AND my ‘Oral B’. I am in a committed and satisfying relationship. Whether it is because I have inhibitions, too much mental noise, or scar tissues from childhood trauma, I cannot seem to achieve climax during intercourse. This is no reflection on my partner and I make sure they are aware of that. Since that is the case, my partner is very understanding and willing to use ‘toys’ together without judgement. It is very liberating to have someone to understand and not get upset because they feel inadequate when you are the one feeling inadequate, ugh…
When my Crescendo arrived I couldn’t wait to try it out. It came in a lovely black box with everything included; the Crescendo (in purple), beautiful satin case, charging base and charging cord. I took out the Mystery Vibe to get a feel for it. The shape is not something that I was used to be found to be interesting and ergo dynamic. I really appreciate the fact that I have to exert a small bit in order to bend it, that indicates to me that it will stay in whatever position I need it to without accidental movement. The shape of the vibrator itself is flexible, yet will mold to the figure of your body, so you will eventually be able to find a comfortable position to put it in while inside of you. The texture of the vibrator is somewhat rubbery and soft, but feels great enough that it causes no discomfort. There is a button on the side that will apparently allow you to cycle thought modes and a button on the other side to change the level of intensity.
After reading the instructions, I figured out how to charge the device. Now came the waiting game. For some reason, I missed the part where it came pre-charged with 15 min battery and charged it fully which takes about an hour to two. Oi vey. No worries I took the time to download the Mystery Vibe app. The user interface is pretty straightforward, even when it comes time to pair the Crescendo with the app. As I was look around the app, there are what I shall call ‘songs’ that you can add to a ‘playlist’. The app allows you to find rhythms and vibes that suit you and you can add them. You can connect the Crescendo to the app and it will cycle through your ‘playlist’. Pretty freaking sweet!! I had already found a few that I was desperate to try out. Don’t make the mistake I did in the photo below, line up the minus symbol on the Crescendo with the arrow on the charging base. (Please excuse my old desk lol)
I wanted to test it out with my significant other but they weren’t picking up the hint. I thought maybe it’s best for me to figure it out first so there aren’t any frustrations or recriminations. 😉
After it was fully charged the fun began.
Before I get into that, let me start off by stating that when I need to take care of me, it is a big production, I have to turn on the shower, lay on the pebble rocks and make sure that all the doors are closed so no one can hear my devices. They are a little bit noisy so I feel self-conscious. Sometimes, I forgo taking care of me because I don’t want to get my hair wet. Silly but true. With my standard devices I have one for clit stimulation and a vibrator for internal stimulation. I am not a slim chick by any stretch, so since I am a chubby wubby it is uncomfortable lying on the shower floor trying to do my thing.
SOOOOOO, with my Crescendo, I didn’t have to get into the shower, it was really quiet. Not noiseless but not the sound of a battery operated toothbrush! In addition, I was able to lay down on my soft bed and not on the floor of my shower stall. AMAZING, right out the gate. So I get comfy, bend Crescendo into a shape I feel will be comfortable and press the side button for 2 seconds to turn it on. At this point I have my phone right next to me (as usual ha) and connect it to the app. I start cycling through the playlist trying to get a ‘feel’ for something that fits right and feels good. OMG let’s be honest all the ‘rhythms’ feel good. But there is always that one that will get your there.
At some point my phone shut off and the Crescendo stopped, I was thrown off. I did not let that stop me. I found that I was able to use it without the app and it is mind blowing. After that it was game on, didn’t have to listen to the tones on the app and was able to concentrate on me more fully. I really enjoyed the fact that my tummy didn’t get in the way or that I didn’t have to get into an awkward position in order to use it because it was shaped in just the right way for me to enjoy myself. Boy did I ever! While lying there, I was not sure at first, but upon exploring what the Crescendo could do, I pushed it in deeper into myself, and that is when everything just lit up! I could feel it! Oh my heaven! This was it! I had hit my G-spot!
For those of you that know and those of you who don’t. There are two kinds or orgasms; one achieved via clitoral stimulation and the other via the elusive G-spot. Both are great but the G-spot orgasm will rock your world and leave you spent. With my other toys it was always via clitoral stimulation but with Crescendo I was able to reach that G-spot and I almost blacked out. It was truly wonderful and deeply satisfying on many levels. I am so grateful to the Mystery Vibe team for making such an amazing product. As I mentioned earlier, it has truly altered my life for the better. I don’t care who you are or what your orientation is, you really need this vibrator in your life. It will help alleviate stress from a hard day, it will help you feel satisfied if you are single, it will put spice back into your love life or sex life. It is truly worth the investment.
I mean come on, we can shell out hundreds of dollars on electronics that connect us to other people, why can’t we shell out a few bucks in order to connect with ourselves and our emotional, sexual and mental well-being? Do yourself or a loved one a favor get a Crescendo.
The Crescendo has earned an A+ for giving me a G-spot orgasm on our first night together. If you are interested, you can go through this link to get your Crescendo from Mystery Vibe with free shipping worldwide! Don’t wait! Get your orgasm today!